Learning About Family as Vocation

Here is an excerpt from my learning contract for the Training and Mentoring program at Denver Seminary this semester:

A major challenge I have faced for a long time is the continual  need to balance work, family and study. This has been a constant struggle throughout my various degree programs over the last six years. Therefore, having focused on vocation particularly in the context of my profession last semester, I would like now to deepen my understanding and practice of my theology of vocation in the context of my family.

Last semester I worked on developing  a holistic working theology of vocation in response to my personal struggle with understanding what God expects of me vocationally. Through this process I made breakthroughs in seeing how my marriage, parenting, studying, church involvement, mentoring, profession etc all fit together as significant aspects of my overall calling. I have moved beyond a mere superficial approach to develop a much deeper understanding of God's call on my life and how that can be expressed in every part of my life as purposeful and sacred work.

I want to know what a healthy Christian family should look like and how I can make my family a place where we can all thrive together. I see this effort as part of my overall program to realize a deeper holistic sense of call for every aspect of my life.

As a husband and father I have never intentionally focused on my family as an area needing development. We have a happy and fruitful family dynamic, but I want to ensure that I have done everything I can to integrate my callings as husband and father within the plexus of my overall vocational understanding and praxis. I struggle at times with not shortchanging my family as I pursue my other passions. For example, my family has, in the past, had to sacrifice because of seminary commitments. This is an ongoing crucial concern between now and graduation as I juggle responsibilities between my family and the demands of my degree program at Denver Seminary. It is my hope and prayer that this learning contract will enable me to incorporate the requirements of the training and mentoring program into the fabric of my family life, and thus have my degree program work for my family instead of against it.

External challenges I will face include knowing how best to schedule time with both Becky alone and also with the kids. With young children it can be difficult to get quality time together as a couple, and also to find good things to do together as a family, when having to also fit in with class and work demands and schedules. With regards to internal challenges, I want to learn how I can grow more in these areas with an attitude of humility rather than thinking that I already have it all together as a husband and father. I also want to learn how to sacrifice for my wife and children and how to have compassion and empathy for them so I can serve them better as father and husband.

What I want firstly to be manifest from this learning contract are visible benefits of my family actually directly enjoying the fruits of my learning and growth (for a change). I also would like to see balance and harmony rather than conflict and shortchanging from integrating my callings as software professional, student and family man. Finally, I want to experience God at work in these areas as he guides and empowers me vocationally in all of life.

Goal: Apply my theology of vocation to my family life in community with God and others so that I can achieve balance and a deeper holistic sense of call as a Christian software professional, student and family man."